Self-pity or Christ Jesus' example?

Have you ever seen how self-pity can poison relationships, lives, health?

Job in the Bible was a classic example of an extreme case of self-pity when he stated, “Let the day perish wherein I was born, and the night in which it was said, There is a man child conceived. Let that day be darkness; let not God regard it from above, neither let the light shine upon it. Let darkness and the shadow of death stain it; let a cloud dwell upon it; let the blackness of the day terrify it…Because it shut not up the doors of my mother’s womb, nor hid sorrow from mine eyes. Why died I not from the womb? Why did I not give up the ghost when I came out of the belly? …”¹ And yet towards the end of Job’s ordeal he was praising God and it is said, “And the Lord turned the captivity of Job, when he prayed for his friends: also the Lord gave Job twice as much as he had before.”²

If anyone was going to feel sorry for himself, it would have been Christ Jesus. In the garden of Gethsemane Jesus had prayed that he didn’t have to go through the crucifixion. But immediately he turned those thoughts back to humble obedience. He knew that sometimes we are required to do things for gain not only for ourselves but as examples for others as well.  The crucifixion of the mortal self brought in the light of the immortal eternal self that we all express and manifest. It was an extreme measure to bear witness to the ultimate reality of us all. Jesus was required to do this in a very big way so that all mankind for all times may see Life as eternal manifestation of God, not the limited view of life in a material aging body.

If Jesus had fallen for the temptations of self-pity how mankind would have missed a ‘great teaching moment’. We would have all missed the opportunity to see and understand eternal life.

When we fall for the voice of self-pity what we’re dealing with is a bad case of ego and ‘poor me’. Jesus felt the sting of pity. But immediately turned away from it and went forward on his course towards eternal life of Good. We must also silence self-pity so that we can be about ‘our Father’s business’³  

Mary Baker Eddy states, “God's ways are not ours. His pity is expressed in modes above the human. His chastisements are the manifestations of Love. The sympathy of His eternal Mind is fully expressed in divine Science, which blots out all our iniquities and heals all our diseases. Human pity often brings pain.”⁴

When we deny self-pity we actually are lifted up into God’s ways, care, and design. We stop listening to the ‘what’ we wanted and didn’t get. As well as the ‘how’ we were treated badly and how hurt we feel. We begin to view life and its activities as opportunities to rise above self. We get to see God’s higher attainments of thoughts and actions.

It is important that we watch our step by watching our thoughts. Are we thinking how we can give to others and lift others in spirit and support? Or are we thinking how others have hurt us and how we can ‘repay them’? Our thoughts lead us astray or lead us to that precious day of happy realization that God is All-in-all.

The Great Designer of all Good sees us in a very different view. We must have our thoughts in place so that we are ready and willing to take each step from the standpoint of God’s direction, not self-pity’s reactions or self-will’s misleading. God doesn’t see the pettiness and the hurts. God only sees what He has created for us to do and express.

When we listen to what we are saying to others it shows a lot about what we are thinking. Are we speaking self-pity in the words of  “She did this to me” or “He said that about me”? Our words speak volumes about what we are thinking. When we listen to ourselves we can see things that needs to be cleared up in our thinking.

By praying to God, He gives to us better ideas through His Word in the Scriptures and better ways. He reveals to us how these thoughts are misleading us or His Ideas are saving us.

“They have sharpened their tongues like a serpent; adders' poison is under their lips. Keep me, O Lord, from the hands of the wicked; preserve me from the violent man; who have purposed to overthrow my goings. The proud have hid a snare for me, and cords; they have spread a net by the wayside; they have set gins for me. I said unto the Lord, Thou art my God: hear the voice of my supplications, O Lord. O God the Lord, the strength of my salvation, thou hast covered my head in the day of battle. Grant not, O Lord, the desires of the wicked: further not his wicked device; lest they exalt themselves. As for the head of those that compass me about, let the mischief of their own lips cover them…I know that the Lord will maintain the cause of the afflicted, and the right of the poor. Surely the righteous shall give thanks unto thy name: the upright shall dwell in thy presence.”⁵

Let us see how self-pity, revenge, reactions, self-will play a part in our own unhappiness. Let us see that by looking to God and His ways we are lifted above all the senses of ‘self’ that tries to separate us from God’s perfect Allness and Good. Let us see that by holding onto self-pity we are the one’s poisoning our days and lives. Let us be as precious of examples as Christ Jesus gave us to be, following his lead.

Gentle hugs


1 The King James Version of the Holy Bible Job 3 vss. 3-12 (not all typed)
2 ibid Job 42 vs. 10
3 ibid Luke 2 vs. 49
4 Miscellaneous Writings by Mary Baker Eddy page 102 lines 17-22
5 The King James Version of the Holy Bible Psalms 140 vss. 3-9, 12, 13